I have a ton of emotions running through me right now. Stress, that I'm still unemployed and may lose my house, car, freedom to live on our own... any number of other things. Extremely anxious, "What if I get a job out of state?" "What if it's temporary?" "Can I really live without my kids and Kris that long?" "Will we move the whole family?" "Will we wait it out until Michigan's economy picks up again?" Obviously I can't stay unemployed THAT long but can I can really commute to some other stat that long? Not seeing my kids everyday? Am I making the most of my time with my kids right now in case that does happen? (Currently my kids are at their grandmother's house for the weekend. But Kris and I are getting some much needed time alone as well.) Not to mention any other family issues and emotions running through my head.
So where am I going with this? While I'm exercising, I don't think about ANY of this. When I think about how I let myself get away from exercising for so long it makes me push that much harder. While running on the elliptical I was reading my Self magazine about a woman's struggles to lost that last 20 pounds, and it gave me a surge to plow through that high hill on the program. Look how far I've come. When I started this weight lose battle (this time around) I was 30 pounds heavier and got SO winded just staying on an elliptical at a low resistance. Sure I have gained 20 pounds from my inital 50 pounds lost but now it's time to think about ME! 2010 is the year for me, hell it's a DECADE for ME. If you make me mad I'm just going to ignore you I don't need the extra emotions. I'm going to keep the positive people in my life and the people who make me happy, and I'm going to concentrate on making me and my family HAPPY!
So 2010 and the 2010s, is all about ME baby! Go ME!!! Go 2010!!!!
Saturday, January 16, 2010
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